For many people, opting out of resolutions isn’t about a lack of intention, it’s about recognizing how often “self-improvement” in January has for the most part been used to justify body surveillance, moral hierarchies around food and movement, and deprivation disguised as health.
I'm still at least a little seduced by the idea of resolutions...or intentions, or whatever you call it but I'm not making any that are body related (except that I would like to think about my body less). I've been focusing on ones about reading books (more rereading, more noir), and attitudes/values in general. One potential resolution I thought of was "consume less, devour more". I also like "living by my values," informed by you, Abbie!
Ohhhh books and values and thinking about my body less…very on board with all of this! Please keep me posted on your favorite books. I love adding to my reading list ♥️
Love the idea of intentions vs resolutions! But what really struck me was “starting over is not the energy I want to bring into this year. It’s to keep going.” It celebrates the growth, it honors the present, and it holds visions of the future. That right there - the idea of a continuum where I am being intentional with my next steps feels so compassionate!
Gretchen, thank you for naming this! The continuity piece feels so important to me right now. To see what we've been doing as something to build on, not erase or correct or fix.
Yes!! It feels so comforting and safe to me to think of life from that perspective. Building, not fixing. As if everything we have been through is the foundation for what is next.
Oh my goodness, the last stanza of the poem you wrote really hit me in the best of ways. Like so many of us, I'm feeling triggered lately to just hop back on that diet culture wagon (the social media trend to post pictures from 2016 and looking at the size of my body ten years ago is causing a bit of a struggle). But your poem, "But it can remind us of what a home really feels like— and what it does not." HAS really reminded me that the gentleness I've shown myself over the last few years feels so much better and so much more like home than I felt ten years ago when I was constantly trying to control the size of my body. As always, thank you for the lovely reminder!
I'm still at least a little seduced by the idea of resolutions...or intentions, or whatever you call it but I'm not making any that are body related (except that I would like to think about my body less). I've been focusing on ones about reading books (more rereading, more noir), and attitudes/values in general. One potential resolution I thought of was "consume less, devour more". I also like "living by my values," informed by you, Abbie!
Ohhhh books and values and thinking about my body less…very on board with all of this! Please keep me posted on your favorite books. I love adding to my reading list ♥️
Love the idea of intentions vs resolutions! But what really struck me was “starting over is not the energy I want to bring into this year. It’s to keep going.” It celebrates the growth, it honors the present, and it holds visions of the future. That right there - the idea of a continuum where I am being intentional with my next steps feels so compassionate!
Gretchen, thank you for naming this! The continuity piece feels so important to me right now. To see what we've been doing as something to build on, not erase or correct or fix.
Yes!! It feels so comforting and safe to me to think of life from that perspective. Building, not fixing. As if everything we have been through is the foundation for what is next.
This was beautiful and such a gentle needed reminder! Thank you for writing and sharing Abbie!🥰
Thank you so much, Em! Appreciate you 🙏🏼
Oh my goodness, the last stanza of the poem you wrote really hit me in the best of ways. Like so many of us, I'm feeling triggered lately to just hop back on that diet culture wagon (the social media trend to post pictures from 2016 and looking at the size of my body ten years ago is causing a bit of a struggle). But your poem, "But it can remind us of what a home really feels like— and what it does not." HAS really reminded me that the gentleness I've shown myself over the last few years feels so much better and so much more like home than I felt ten years ago when I was constantly trying to control the size of my body. As always, thank you for the lovely reminder!