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Whitney Wildeboer's avatar

I've been thinking about this a lot lately - and trying to internalize so many of these reminders. This will definitely be something I reread frequently! I'm traveling to France at the end of this month. I spent a significant amount of time in France when I was in my 20s and in a smaller body. I'm unexpectedly having a really hard time wrapping my brain around being there again - but older and looking differently than I used to. Instead of just being excited for my trip (which I am), I'm also feeling a bit of an identity/body image crisis. I keep telling myself just what you said in this newsletter - bodies are meant to change over time. I'm fortunately in a really happy stage of my life right now so I keep telling myself "You're the happiest you've ever been and this is your current body. Enjoy being THIS version of yourself in France." But it is still a struggle. So long story short, thank you for these affirmations I plan to carry with me all the way to France (and beyond)!

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Abbie Attwood's avatar

Whitney! I hope you have the most beautiful trip. I love everything you've shared, and I know others will relate to all of it. I know I do. Something that I've also come back to in the past (that I was reminded of because you mentioned your upcoming travel / adventure) is to ground myself in what the purpose of a body truly is. The purpose of a body is not what it looks like. It's that it allows us to be here -- to connect with others, to see things, to have adventures (like France!), to experience whatever it is that brings us joy and meaning. Yes, enjoy the NOW version of you and your body. And soak up everything you can on that trip. I am very grateful to have you in this community!

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Whitney Wildeboer's avatar

YES! I'm adding "what is the purpose of my body" to my arsenal of affirmations!

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Emily Edmond's avatar

Wow perfect timing (again)! I’ve been feeling a little bit sad, a little down, lately, every time I try on clothes that are too small (either because I’ve changed or because I’ve ordered the wrong size). These affirmations will definitely help! 😊

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Abbie Attwood's avatar

So glad this landed on a day when you needed it, Emily! I'm sending you a big hug today. Clothes should fit you, not the other way around. You deserve comfort, always.

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Rosanne Keep's avatar

Same, Emily. I see you.

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Emily Edmond's avatar

🥹

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Elizabeth's avatar

I hate all the predatory messaging towards women about perimenopause/menopause. I’m not at that stage of my life yet, but I’ve started to be so afraid of it because of the fear mongering around weight gain, hormone changes, decrease in muscle, etc.

My mom went through it and had awful hot flashes, but not much else. I should find that reassuring because I think genetics play a large role in how you experience it, but it’s hard with having a history of an ED and gaining weight is so demonized in the U.S. with the current presidential administration right now.

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Abbie Attwood's avatar

I completely agree with you, Elizabeth! The conversations about menopause are becoming so steeped in the misinformation pushed by anti-aging / wellness culture. It’s really awful to witness. We need to be supporting women through different stages, not tearing them down and using scare tactics to sell things. It’s very similar to how much fear-mongering girls experience around body changes in puberty. Just keep remembering that the body is adapting — your body is showing up for you and doing its best every day. Including these transitions.

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sarah's avatar

Politics??

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Elizabeth's avatar

Yes, because being anti-diet is inherently political.

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Deborah Dean's avatar

“And yet, we forget that we are nature too — meant to bend, to bloom, to change, to grow, to break and begin again.”- beautifully written.

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Abbie Attwood's avatar

thank you so much, Deborah!

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Rosanne Keep's avatar

Your comparison between Nature and bodies truly resonates , Abbie. I've added it as a "Note" in my phone but I think it needs to be posted in our home as a gentle reminder that's visible whenever needed. And as a Gen X'er dealing with the ghosts of Diet Culture of yore, plus the current "Wellness" and "Perimeno" messaging, it's NEEDED.

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sarah's avatar

I’m afraid I am not going to keep following. It’s entirely irresponsible to push the obesity is ok line. There is a range for a “sweet spot” of normal and healthy. Review data and one will find too thin and too fat will be those most likely to have problems and correlated life spans.

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Abbie Attwood's avatar

Hi Sarah, I appreciate you sharing your thoughts, and I understand this perspective is one many of us have been taught for a long time.

This space is not about denying that health matters — it's about challenging the harmful assumption that body size alone is a reliable or ethical measure of health or worth. There's a growing body of research showing that weight stigma itself contributes to poor health outcomes, and that behaviors, access to care, social determinants, and systemic inequities play a far greater role.

What’s often framed as a “sweet spot” in BMI or body weight doesn’t account for individual variation, racial and genetic diversity, trauma, chronic illness, or how often people are harmed by the pursuit of thinness itself. This newsletter advocates for compassionate, evidence-informed care that honors body diversity — not for ignoring health, but for redefining it beyond appearance.

If you want to learn a bit more about this weight and health outcome research, the episode I linked in this newsletter (with Ragen Chastain) is a really helpful one!

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sarah's avatar

Thank you

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Elizabeth's avatar

Abbie is not pushing obesity as okay, but obesity is an extremely fat-phobic and stigmatizing term. She’s saying that you shouldn’t base your self-worth on your body size.

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