“When it comes to sex — especially if we're someone who's been focused on shrinking or changing our body, or being what somebody else wants us to be — it's hard to tap into, what do I like? what feels good in varying forms of intimacy?”
- Noelle Benach, LCPC, CST, on this week’s episode of the pod
Let’s talk about sex (a much-requested topic, by the way!). But wait. I’m interested in the kind of sex talk that honors and centers our history with disordered eating, body dissatisfaction, and the oppressive nature of diet culture.
So, that’s what we’re gonna do.
Fat-positive sex therapist, Noelle Benach, joins me on the podcast this week to explore the deeply complex terrain of sex, intimacy, body image, and pleasure.
We talk about how our early experiences with food and the messages we received about our bodies can echo into our adult relationships — not just with partners, but with ourselves.
Noelle shares her personal journey through body image struggles, living with diabetes, and becoming a sex therapist who centers pleasure and body liberation. Together, we peel back the layers of shame and expectation that often surround sexuality, especially for those of us socialized as women.
In the free version of the episode:
The way childhood experiences with food and body shape our understanding of intimacy
How living with diabetes impacted Noelle’s relationship with food and her body
The ways diet culture distorts our relationship to desire, sexuality, and self-worth
Pleasure as an act of resistance and body reclamation
Relearning intimacy after years of body shame
How societal expectations around sex and desire affect women and marginalized bodies
Redefining intimacy beyond just sex
Behind the paywall on Substack, we get into:
What to do when partners have mismatched levels of sexual desire
Why conversations about intimacy feel intimidating—and why they’re worth having
Reclaiming physical connection after distance or disconnection
Honoring consent, sensory needs, and what actually feels good
How body shame blocks connection, pleasure, and presence
The radical power of self-pleasure and solo intimacy
Creating emotionally safe spaces for open, honest connection
The therapeutic process of reconnecting with desire
Listen right here!
This conversation is a loving permission slip to redefine intimacy on our own terms, to reclaim pleasure as our birthright, and to remember that our bodies are worthy of love, care, and connection — just as they are.
About Noelle:
Noelle Benach, LCPC, CST (She/Her) is a Baltimore based Psychotherapist and AASECT Certified Sex Therapist. Noelle works with adult individuals, couples and those in non-monogamous relationships to address concerns such as sexuality and desire, body liberation, LGBTQIA+ issues, chronic illness concerns, neurodivergence, anxiety, fertility issues, and parenting stress. Noelle identifies herself as queer, fat, neurodivergent, and chronically ill and believes those intersections of her identity positively influence her work with clients who have similar lived experiences.
